Three structured first-session formats that have proven their worth in systemic counselling practice — a growth arc, a step-plan and an anchor question. Insights from more than 20 years of family work.

Why a template — and why more than one?

In my experience, first sessions rarely fail because of the client system; they fail because of the setting. Walking into the first session without a plan means either rolling out the genogram too early ("Let's just draw this out") or letting the family conversation wander without a structural anchor. Both produce a diffuse dissatisfaction — for clients and for counsellors alike.

Three templates have proven robust in my own practice and in intervision groups over many years. They are not competing alternatives; they address different types of engagement. Choosing the template is part of the preparation — not something to figure out during the session itself.

Template 1: The Step-Plan (for clearly defined mandates)

Suitable when clients arrive with a concrete question ("How do I handle my father, who has been withdrawing since my mother's death?") and have a clear mandate.

Structure (60 minutes):

  1. Clarifying the mandate (10 min): "What would be a good outcome from this session for you?" — Ask for a concrete answer, no generic formulas.
  2. Context frame (10 min): Who lives with whom, since when, how are things currently? Not relationship qualities yet — just structure.
  3. Genogram sketch (20 min): I draw, the client talks. Three generations, no claim to completeness.
  4. Joint hypothesis-building (15 min): "What stands out to you when you see it like this?" — the client first, then my observation as an offer.
  5. Next steps (5 min): One concrete task or reflection until the next appointment.

Template 2: The Growth Arc (for open life-stage themes)

Suitable when clients arrive with a diffuse dissatisfaction ("I can't seem to move forward in my life") and the session is meant to provide orientation.

Here the genogram comes later — only after 25–30 minutes. First comes the inner movement: Where do I come from, where do I want to go, what holds me back? Only once that tension is visible does the genogram become the map for the movement.

The growth arc follows Karl Tomm's concept of "interventive interviewing": every question is both diagnostics and intervention. If clients leave with the feeling of having "set something in motion" — even without a concrete result — the growth arc has been well executed.

Template 3: The Anchor Question (for highly burdened first sessions)

Suitable when clients arrive in acute crisis (a fresh separation, a death, a sudden diagnosis). A structural template would be too much here — the client would not feel met.

Instead: a single question that carries the conversation as an anchor. Tested anchor questions:

  • "Who is holding you right now?"
  • "What brings you here — rather than staying home on the sofa?"
  • "What would you need today for this conversation to have been worth it?"

With this template, the genogram often only emerges in the second or third session. Forcing it in the first session risks the client not coming back.

Practice vignette

A 52-year-old client comes after the sudden death of her brother. My first impulse: genogram immediately. I decide against it and instead use the anchor question "Who is holding you right now?". The answer: nobody. We spend 50 minutes on the story of the past three weeks. The genogram emerges in session 3 — and is the key by then, because she has built up enough trust to also show the difficult brother–father relationship.

What does not work

Switching templates mid-session. If I start with Template 1 and notice the client would actually fit Template 3 better, I stick with the current template and adjust for the next session. Methodological haste comes across as unprofessional — even when it would be substantively justified.

Further reading